Cannabis-Infused Funeral Potatoes That Resurrect the Dead
(the Mormon side dish that looked at heaven, said “nah,” and opened a portal instead)
Creamy, cheesy, corn-flake-crusted hashbrown apocalypse wearing a velvet 11 mg THC crown that turns every family reunion into a full-blown séance. One square = the official casserole of “Grandma just sat up in the coffin and asked for seconds.”
Servings: one 9×13 pan → 12 squares of damnation
THC per square: 11 mg (dead-on)
Total time: 70 minutes active + 7 days of infusion worship
CANNABIS INFUSION: 11 mg THC BUTTER (the golden ticket to the afterlife)
1 lb (4 sticks) unsalted European butter
4.5 g finely ground decarboxylated 18–20% THC flower (≈ 290 mg usable THC total batch)
Decarboxylation
- oven exactly 240 °F
- 4.5 g ground flower razor-thin on parchment
- 40 minutes exactly → cool completely
Infusion (water-bath, no blasphemy)
1. Fill pot with water, low simmer
2. Entire 1 lb butter into a 32-oz mason jar, melt in bath
3. Add cooled decarbed weed, lid loose
4. Hold 185–195 °F for exactly 3 hours, gentle swirl every 30 min
5. Remove, rest 10 min
6. Double-strain while hot: cheesecloth twist + coffee filter
7. Fridge overnight → glowing emerald-flecked gold
Yield ≈ 440 g → every heaping tablespoon (≈16 g) = exactly 11 mg THC
FUNERAL POTATO INGREDIENTS (one 9×13 pan)
2 lb frozen shredded hashbrowns (thawed)
All 440 g (132 mg total) THC butter, melted
1 can (10.5 oz) cream of chicken soup
2 cups sour cream
½ cup diced yellow onion
2 cups shredded sharp cheddar
1 cup shredded monterey jack
1 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp garlic powder
2 tsp fresh cracked black pepper
3 cups crushed corn flakes
extra ½ cup regular melted butter for topping (non-medicated unless you hate tomorrow)
INSTRUCTIONS
1. Preheat oven to 350 °F. Grease a 9×13 pan like you’re hiding evidence.
2. Mix thawed hashbrowns, THC butter, soup, sour cream, onion, cheeses, salt, garlic powder, and pepper in a giant bowl until it looks like creamy sin.
3. Spread evenly into the pan.
4. Mix crushed corn flakes with the ½ cup regular melted butter, scatter over the top like a golden shroud.
5. Bake 50–60 minutes until bubbling violently and the top is the color of burnt offerings.
6. Let rest 10 minutes (or don’t, live dangerously). Cut into 12 squares.
7. Serve to the relative who claims “edibles don’t work on me.” Watch them take one bite, eyes glaze, and whisper “…Grandpa just forgave me for the will.”
PRO TIPS
- That THC butter keeps forever and only gets more vengeful.
- Lighter dose? Go to church like a normal person.
- If the corn flakes start chanting in tongues and the casserole levitates three inches off the table, congratulations; you just achieved funeral enlightenment.
Equal parts hashbrowns, cheese, cream of sin, and the overwhelming urge to confess everything at 3 a.m.
#FuneralPotatoesFromHell #11mgAndLastRites #CasseroleCult #theedibleafterlife #grandmasghostapproved