Cannabis-Infused Miso-Caramel Bacon Cinnamon Rolls That Delete Your Childhood Home from Google Maps

Cannabis-Infused Miso-Caramel Bacon Cinnamon Rolls That Delete Your Childhood Home from Google Maps  
(the breakfast pastry that looked at your entire upbringing, hit “remove from Street View,” and replaced it with a taste so unholy it redacts the past)

Gooey, miso-butterscotch caramel dripping down 65 mg THC bacon-studded cinnamon rolls so obscene they blur your childhood address forever. One roll = the official pastry of “I just drove past where I grew up and it’s now a cornfield… and I’m weirdly okay with that.”

Servings: 9 giant rolls (or 1 if you’re done with nostalgia)  
THC per roll: exactly 65 mg  
Total time: 4 hours + overnight proof + 7 days proper infusion

CANNABIS INFUSION: 65 mg THC LECITHIN MISO BUTTER  
454 g European-style unsalted butter  
14.8 g cannabis flower testing 22 % THC (≈ 3256 mg total THC pre-decarb)  
2 tbsp (14 g) sunflower lecithin granules  
80 g white shiro miso (the sweetest, mildest kind)

DECARBOXYLATION  
240 °F exact, 14.8 g medium-fine grind, thin layer on parchment, 40 minutes → cool completely

INFUSION (lab-grade)  
1. Melt butter in 32-oz mason jar in 200 °F water bath  
2. At 185 °F add decarbed cannabis + lecithin + miso (whisk miso in until fully dissolved)  
3. Hold 185–195 °F exactly 2 hours, hard swirl every 15 min  
4. Strain hot through 90-micron + coffee filter  
5. Cool 10 min → whip 60 sec to re-emulsify  
6. Fridge overnight → pale golden umami weapon  
Yield ≈ 490 g containing 585 mg total usable THC  
→ 65 mg per 54.4 g portion (per roll)

DOUGH & FILLING  
500 g bread flour  
220 g whole milk, warmed to 95 °F  
70 g granulated sugar  
2½ tsp instant yeast  
2 eggs  
80 g of the THC miso butter, melted  
10 g salt  
200 g dark brown sugar + 3 tbsp cinnamon + 150 g crispy chopped bacon for filling  
Remaining 410 g THC miso butter for filling + glaze

GLAZE  
Leftover miso butter melted with 100 g powdered sugar + splash of milk until pourable

INSTRUCTIONS  
1. Make enriched dough with first 80 g THC miso butter; knead 10 min, proof 90 min until doubled.  
2. Roll into 16×20 inch rectangle. Spread almost all remaining THC miso butter, sprinkle brown sugar + cinnamon + bacon.  
3. Roll tight, slice into 9 fat rolls. Place in buttered 9×13 pan. Proof 60 min.  
4. Bake 25–28 min at 350 °F until deep golden.  
5. While hot, pour remaining melted THC miso butter + glaze over the top. Each roll absorbs exactly 54.4 g infused fat = 65 mg THC.  
6. Hand one to the friend who “grew up on grandma’s cinnamon rolls.” Watch them bite, stare into the distance, and whisper “…my childhood house just 404’d on Google Earth and these are somehow better.”

PRO TIPS  
Onset 20–40 min. Lecithin + bacon fat + sugar = emotional time-travel rocket fuel.  
Reheat leftovers in microwave and accidentally erase another memory.  
If the rolls start humming your old home phone number backwards, you have achieved cinnamon enlightenment.

Nine rolls. Zero past.

#MisoMemoryWipe #65mgAndStreetViewGone #LecithinCinnamon #theedibleerasure #rollthatunmapsyou