Cannabis-Infused Rendered Wagyu Suet Yorkshire Puddings That Unlist You from the Phone Book

Cannabis-Infused Rendered Wagyu Suet Yorkshire Puddings That Unlist You from the Phone Book  

(the towering, crackling popovers that looked at every White Pages ever printed, laughed in beefy baritone, and hit delete)

Golden, glassy domes rising two inches over the tin, dripping with 55 mg THC A5 wagyu suet so pure they erase your landline, your childhood rotary number, and the very concept of being reachable. One pudding = the official side dish of “I just called my own old house and the new owners swear nobody by that name ever lived there.”

Servings: 12 towering puddings (or 3 if you’re done with civilization)  

THC per pudding: exactly 55 mg  

Total time: 90 minutes active + 7 days proper infusion

CANNABIS INFUSION: 55 mg THC LECITHIN WAGYU SUET  

454 g rendered A5 wagyu suet (melted straining trimmings yourself is best)  

12.5 g cannabis flower testing 22 % THC (≈2750 mg total THC pre-decarb  

2 tbsp (14 g) sunflower lecithin granules

DECARBOXYLATION  

240 °F exact, 12.5 g medium-fine grind, thin layer on parchment, 40 minutes → cool completely

INFUSION (lab-grade)  

1. Melt suet in 32-oz mason jar in 200 °F water bath  

2 At 185 °F add decarbed cannabis + lecithin  

3 Hold 185–195 °F exactly 2 hours, hard swirl every 15 min  

4 Strain hot through 90-micron + coffee filter  

5 Cool 10 min → whip 60 sec to re-emulsify  

6 Pour into silicone mold or jar, fridge overnight → pure white gold  

Yield ≈ 410 g containing 660 mg total usable THC  

→ 55 mg per 34.2 g portion (per pudding)

YORKSHIRE PUDDING BATTER  

180 g all-purpose flour  

4 large eggs  

200 ml whole milk  

100 ml water  

½ tsp fine sea salt  

The entire 410 g (660 mg total) THC wagyu suet

INSTRUCTIONS  

1 The night before: make batter. Whisk eggs into flour until smooth paste, gradually add milk + water + salt. Cover and refrigerate overnight (critical for height).  

2 One hour before baking: place 34.2 g (exactly) of solid THC suet into each well of a 12-cup popover or muffin tin. Place tin in cold oven, then preheat to 450 °F. Fat will melt and get rocket-hot.  

3 When oven hits 450 °F and fat is shimmering (about 15 min), quickly whisk batter once more and pour exactly to the brim of each screaming-hot well.  

4 Bake 20 minutes at 450 °F — DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR. Drop to 375 °F and bake another 12–15 minutes until mahogany and taller than your ego.  

5 Remove. Each pudding will have absorbed exactly 34.2 g infused suet = 55 mg THC.  

6 Serve immediately to the friend who swears “edibles don’t work slow.” Watch them tear one open, inhale the beefy steam, and mutter “…my name just vanished from my mom’s contacts and I feel fantastic about it.”

PRO TIPS  

Onset 12–25 min. Pure rendered suet + lecithin = orbital insertion.  

Leftover suet keeps 9 months frozen; roast potatoes in it and accidentally become untraceable.  

If the puddings rise so high they touch the oven roof and start humming dial-up modem sounds, you have achieved Yorkshire enlightenment.

Twelve popovers. Zero directory listings.

#SuetUnlisting #55mgAndNoPhoneBook #LecithinPopover #theediblevanishing #puddingthatunpersonsyou